


I like the chance you take (I like the mess you make)

by twinOrigins



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Crushes, First Kiss, Fluff, M/M, Rich says fuck a lot, Star Trek References, at the beginning, there is like...a little angst?, which is a given for everything I write
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-26
Updated: 2017-08-26
Packaged: 2018-12-19 22:24:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,956
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11907435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twinOrigins/pseuds/twinOrigins
Summary: Realizing he was bi after the SQUIP was gone led him to also realizing that his feelings for Michael werenot platonic.They never had been.





	I like the chance you take (I like the mess you make)

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so annoyed that this didn't make it to 2,000 words -_- so close yet so far.....
> 
> Title is from You Always Make Me Smile by Kyle Andrews because it seemed to suit this lil fic very well (u should listen to it if u don't know it!)
> 
> First BMC fic! I'm sure I'll be writing a lot more though because I fucking love BMC,,,
> 
> I don't think I directly referenced Michael being trans in this so I didn't wanna tag it but just know every Michael I write is trans thank u and goodnight 
> 
> ((PS MICHAELS NICKNAME BEING MICAH IS THE MOST PRECIOUS THING ON THIS EARTH AND A PIECE OF MY SOUL ASCENDS EVERY TIME I READ IT IN FICS))

Rich had always admired Michael. He had seen something of a kindred spirit in him. While he and Michael both were losers, neither of them weighed their self esteem on their social status. They were both confident and open enough to be the total fuckin' geeks they are.

So Rich really admired that about Michael--even way back in freshman year. He also liked his love of music, how those gigantic headphones were always present on Michael's head or around his neck, even when he wasn't listening to anything. How he'd talk to anyone who would listen about the latest 'super cool' vintage item he'd gotten. Rich wanted nothing more in the world than to be his friend.

But it gets very lonely, not having anyone. Rich found that out quickly. He discovered the difference between him and Michael was that Michael had Jeremy. Michael had Jeremy, his player two, his person to lean on even when he had no one else.

Rich was all alone.

Consequently, when he hit a rough patch with his father and was feeling more lost than usual, he went to the guy at the bowling alley. The shady one he'd heard about.

He said _'hey man, what do you have? I need something to make me feel better about my life for a while.'_

The guy says _'go see my cousin at Payless. He'll hook you up with what you need.'_

Rich didn't expect things to go the way they did. He wanted to be a cheery person, be able to shoot daisies out of his ass and say he's grateful for the SQUIP, in the end, because it led him where he is now--sitting on Michael's couch with him--but having the SQUIP was one giant, never-ending nightmare for him and he could never find the positivity in that.

"--and it's like, I'm happy for him--of course I am, he's my best bro and he's wanted this for ages--but I still haven't been able to shake off this fucking crush, y'know. I can't be _100%_ happy, and I really wanna be. I want to be satisfied with just being his friend, I want to stop _wanting_." Even though he was being incredibly candid in a way most people struggled with, Michael said this all with eyes intently on the screen. He was playing some temple in LOZ, but Rich hadn't been paying much attention. He was focused on Michael. The easy way Michael talked about things was another bullet point on the 'reasons Michael Mell is amazing' list.

He and Michael's friendship had begun shortly after Rich got out of the hospital. Now, a couple months later, they were pretty close. He wasn't sure if Michael considered him a best friend, but he was Rich's. Jake was his best friend too, just...in a different way. Either way, Michael considered him a close enough friend to share his feelings about Jeremy. Rich was grateful regardless.

He spoke without thinking. "Yeah, I can kinda relate." Realizing he was bi after the SQUIP was gone led him to also realizing that his feelings for Michael were _not platonic_. They never had been.

"Jake?" Michael looked over at him long enough to give him a sympathetic look. "I know he and Chloe still have their unhealthy off and on thing going."

Rich giggled loudly, slapping a hand over his mouth to muffle the sound. "Sorry! That just surprised me. No, he's hot but I'd probably kill him if we dated."

Michael thought about it, nodding with a small smirk. "That's fair. Who is it then? I didn't think you were super close with the girls...?"

He wasn't actively keeping it from Michael, but he wasn't overly keen on revealing his silly crush. Michael was a great guy and he knew he wouldn't be _bad_  about it, but feelings always made things weird. Sometimes it was better not knowing how the other person felt.

He imbued his voice with the chill nonchalance he'd learned from the SQUIP--though the effect was somewhat diminished with his lisp. "It's not important. You were talking about Jeremy."

"It's not just one way, man!" He paused his game and shifted himself more so he was facing Rich. "If I go on ridiculous crush rants, you have to too! Them's the rules."

Rich couldn't help smiling. God, Michael was precious. "It's you, you dork."

Michael's jaw dropped. Rich waited for him to say something. When a good 30 seconds passed with Michael just sitting there looking shocked and confused, Rich poked him in the arm.

"Dude--"

"How long?" Michael interrupted him.

Rich didn't need him to clarify, though he kind of wanted to play like he didn't understand just to put off answering the question.

"Freshman year. I mean, I didn't know I was bi then. I just thought I really, _really_  wanted to be your friend. But," He shrugged, splaying his hands out in front of him, a 'what can you do' type of gesture. "Here I am. Bi as hell."

"Oh no." Michael said softly. He looked at Rich with wide eyes.

Rich laughed a little despite himself. "'Oh no' is not very high up on the list of things you want to hear when telling someone about your weird, giant crush on them."

"No, no, it's just--I feel like such an ass!"

Rich blinked. " _What?_  Why the fuck would you--"

"Because! I've just been talking to you about Jeremy all this time and you have to feel awful about it!"

Was this boy even real? He was too good.

"You had no idea, why would you feel bad about that? Plus, it's not like I'm mopey and pining and shit. What we have is good. Significantly less brojobs than I'd like--"

His last statement had the intended effect, thankfully. Michael snorted and grabbed a throw pillow off the floor to whack him with. The upset look he'd had before was gone. "Rich, that word was only meant for ironic purposes. You've ruined it."

"Au contraire, I made it better. It should be used all the time. This is what every sci-fi universe was missing when they predicted the future: the perfect mix of innuendo and no homo blended together into everyday phrases." He gave a self satisfied smile, convinced he'd dropped some ground-breaking wisdom.

"I would say Kirk and Spock brought that to the table, but they didn't even bother with the no homo part of it."

Rich nodded sagely. "Ten bucks says they fucked after the backrub scene."

"Rich!" Michael cackled. "I want to tell you off but you're so right."

Michael had started playing his game again. They both settled into a quiet lull in the conversation, just the sound of the controller and the soft hum of music from the game. Rich thought things good when he noticed that Link kept getting slaughtered. Really frequently.

His brow furrowed as he looked at Michael. "Micah, are you upset? This is why I didn't tell you earlier than this, I didn't want the weirdness. Being your friend has been great, I'm cool with that. C'mon, shortstuff, talk to me. Let's work this out so we can go back to before."

"What if I don't want to?"

"I'm not following."

Michael sighed and tossed his controller haphazardly into his lap.

Rich winced. "Ay, careful with the hardware! Don't take it out on the controller!"

"It's just--so before, I was so hung up on Jeremy that I didn't really, like, consider anyone else? Like that one Arctic Monkeys song," Rich had no idea who the Arctic Monkeys were, but he nodded along anyway. Michael had a really expansive taste in music, he was always recommending things to listen to. Rich usually stuck with the same five songs when left to his own devices. "But, now I'm thinking about it. A lot. And I'm confused."

He really did look bewildered. There was a little wrinkle on his forehead and he was fidgeting mindlessly with the buttons on the controller. Rich refrained from taking his thumb and smoothing out the wrinkle.

"You know what you need?"

Michael gave a dubious look.

Rich rummaged through their snack pile, grabbing a can of Surge and holding it up in a flawless Rafiki impersonation. "A drink."

That got Michael to crack a small smile. Rich felt very proud of himself. Michael swiped the can and took a long swig. He stuck his tongue out and made a face. "This isn't as good when it's lukewarm."

"You fucking try ancient sodas from the 70s, don't talk to me." Rich shoved his shoulder, making sure he wouldn't spill his drink first.

Michael held up a finger. "False. Those are hella expensive, I've only tried 90s ones. Those are easier to find."

Rich had gotten his own soda and was chugging it. He burped. "My point still stands. You aren't a worthy soda judge. Your taste buds probably are all shriveled up and weeping."

"Can I kiss you?"

Rich choked. He felt it was a very justified response, given that he had been talking about drinks and taste buds not two seconds before.

" _What the fuck?_ "

Michael hurriedly turned away. "Forget I said that."

"Oh hell no, we're talking about this." He sniffed, feeling a burn. A little soda had gotten up his nose.

He flopped back against the cushion and groaned. "I really like you! I've liked Jeremy for _years_  but I've loved being friends with you so much lately and we hang out all the time and then you dropped this bomb about liking me and _god_  I don't know why, I just can't stop thinking about kissing you!"

"Not to ruin this but...have you ever even kissed anyone?"

Michael turned a faint shade of pink and bit his bottom lip. "Ha. Well. Jeremy?" Before Rich could react he was waving his hands and adding on, "We were kids! Twelve or something! It was just--it wasn't a thing. It doesn't count. So this would be the first."

He raised an eyebrow. "And Jeremy is sure he's not bi?"

Michael made a face.

"Right, yeah, not the time."

With that, he put both their cans down and shuffled closer on his knees. He put a hand on Michael's face, his thumb rubbing the soft skin there. Michael blinked owlishly up at him. "Let me know if you decide you're not into this. I'll be fine either way."

It'd hurt, kissing Michael and then being told it just wasn't the same for him but--he was too selfish not to at least _t_ _ry_  and see where it went.

Waiting until Michael nodded in acquiescence, he leaned forward and kissed him. It was very obvious he had no clue what he was doing, his movements tentative and curious, but Rich found it endearing as hell.

Michael's hands slowly made their way to Rich, toying with the edge of his tank top before he slipped a hand beneath it just to stroke his hip.

Rich broke away with a gasp, needing confirmation before they kissed any longer.

"What's your verdict, sir?" He was feeling hopeful, given that the words were said against Michael's lips.

Michael hummed. "I want a lot more of this to start happening."

Rich gave a breathless laugh. "Sounds good." He kissed the tip of Michael's nose.

"And dates? Can we try that?"

He pretended to think it over. "Acceptable."

Before Rich could lean in to kiss him again, he said "And maybe brojobs."

Rich collapsed into a fit of giggles, his head falling onto Michael's shoulder. "Shut up, we were having a moment!"

"Right, right. It's your job to ruin the moment."

"Damn right."


End file.
